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i've had no tea yet today so i'm slogging through work. my mind is all over the place today and i just got a new book i'm *dying* to run off and read.

i'm thinking a lot about integrity and boundaries and sacrifices. i've frequently been confused about putting on acts or lying about who you are in order to gain attention. but what happens when those lies become habit? have you changed? really? are they now the truth? are you really friendlier/more outgoing/sexier/easier with a laugh/less inclined to speak your mind?

I'm really excited about this year. Nervous. But I was sure to bring several things to read, as my pure nerd status predicted.

Pure Nerd 73 % Nerd, 17% Geek, 26% Dork

For The Record: A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia. A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one. A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions. You scored better than half in Nerd, earning you the title of: Pure Nerd. The times, they are a-changing. It used to be that being exceptionally smart led to being unpopular, which would ultimately lead to picking up all of the traits and tendences associated with the "dork." No-longer. Being smart isn't as socially crippling as it once was, and even more so as you get older: eventually being a Pure Nerd will likely be replaced with the following label: Purely Successful. Congratulations! Thanks Again! -- THE NERD? GEEK? OR DORK? TEST

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 81% on nerdiness You scored higher than 10% on geekosity You scored higher than 35% on dork points

Link: The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating

Others' lifes is your salvation. Listening to
people's problems is your way to escape
reality. You have an extraordinary wonderful
soul, but this soul is carrying the whole world
in its shoulders. With your understanding
restless nature, you are constantly looking for
answers.
~~I carry the whole world on my shoulders~~


What's your way to escape reality? What's your salvation?
brought to you by Quizilla

Men!
Originally uploaded by Hjem.

It's hard to keep your cool hipster expterior when you start blushing. And even harder when your friend laughs and cries out, "Look at her blushing! She's bright red!" *blush*

I'm craving chicken.

I fear the end of my vegetarian-ness is nigh. (Good thing I'm in a Tibetan linage!!)

And I don't even much like chicken.

Argh.

~~~~
Did you notice? I moved over to hjemrss--the feed from here--for the most part.

eigenvector was kind enough to jump on the task of creating an RSS feed of my new blog's location for LJ.

See hjemrss for updates! (I can't sort out how to get the satellite to show up in the link.)

We got trapped on the train again today.

The doors in the second car just wouldn't open. Some little old woman in red was having a really hard time and started in on me when I mentioned to the guy who was repeatedly pushing the call button that the doors open automatically and it's all run by computer underground. I meant to relay that the driver wasn't being lax in his door opening duties. It seemed to release the man's anger, but the little old woman across the isle started talking about Unions and how she' d worked for the Unions 50 years before I was born and someone should be working in each car and they fought against automation and she doesn't trust computers.

And "It's nothing to smile about!" This had never happened in the 20 years she'd been here.

~Well, It's happened to me.

Really.

~Yes.

Was everything all right?

~Yes, everything was fine.

This is a problem.

~People make mistakes, too.

Yes, but this is a problem!

~If you make it one.

There should be someone in the car. In each car! Someone who'd know what to do in an emergency.

~Look, he's telling her what to do. (As the driver pointed through the window to pull the big red emergency lever.)

See, I wouldn't have known to do that, there should be someone to tell you!

I know what it feels like to panic, so I feel badly that she was having a rough time. I just couldn't help but smile though. What else was there to do but sit and wait?

Which is exactly what I'm having to do in terms of Galahad AGAIN!!! I came home to find he'd pried open the bathroom window and run off. I just hope he avoids that garage this time.

Him being gone is a problem if I make it one.

My center is having a run on Sukhavatis (Buddhist funerals) this week. We had one Monday and another Thursday.

The first was pretty unique in that the person's body laid in state in our shrine room for three days prior. There was a nice note taped to the door, since the three days fell over a weekend and it was possible we'd have new visitors. There was optional sitting in the community room if you weren't up for the dead experience.

I went to sit for about an hour and a half in the shrine room before the ceremony began, yet managed to be in the shrine room a total of about 30 seconds. People were trying to sort out setting up for the feast after the ceremony and so I helped with that. Mostly I reached for platters and bowls which were too high for other people to reach.

And I did the flowers for next to the coffin in the shrine room. Yes! You read that right. *I* did flowers. *gulp* I figure that was pretty much as much a practice as sitting. Flower arranging is my charnel ground. ;-)

I left mid way through the ceremony. I was exhausted from returning from Thanksgiving the day before and I hadn't eaten in a long time and I didn't know the man who had died and his sons were being so open--I felt a bit voyeuristic.

Yesterday I received notice the father of another sangha member died just before Thanksgiving. He'd been diagnosed this summer with something terminal and quick. She's been fairly upset by the whole experience. His Sukhaviti is tomorrow. I'll try to go to that since I'm sure she'll like to know so many of her community love and support her.

As a sangha, it's good practice.

My check STILL hasn't come. My direct deposit paperwork wasn't correct and wasn't sent back. It probably wasn't sent at all...somehow my paperwork was overlooked. The woman who handles that sort of thing is really confused and keeps saying she has no idea how it could have happened.

Now I can't pay my rent. My check was cut last Tuesday, that's 8 days and 6 mail days (minus Sunday and Thanksgiving) and my co-worker got his.

I got a signed letter to drop by the management office tomorrow morning, with a check for most of my rent, explaining about how I haven't yet been paid.

I am not happy.

I've been seeing these and finally followed the link. Turns out you don't just fill in the blank and pick some colors. Well, you do pick some colors but it comes up with the noun. I didn't plan this, really:

meditation is love
brought to you by the isLove Generator

he he he...and here is my second truthful response generation:

dancing is love
brought to you by the isLove Generator

mouth
Originally uploaded by Hjem.

What a fantastic day, information wise.

A key piece of a puzzle fell into place in terms of someone I know and that person's behaviour. Not that it makes it any easeir to deal with, but things seem to make more sense now.

Then either a water main broke or someone took out a fire hydrant. I posted photos on my flickr account. It wasn't going for too long after we noticed it.

For lunch, I went to the bookstore! So hard to know those new books were in my bag for the whole afternoon and to not look at them! An new Stitch N Bitch book, a good fiction distraction, and something wich will hopefully help me understand at last one of my friends better.

Now the work day is over. I'm finally home with a few hours to myself. Galahad is camped out in front of the gas heater giving himself a bath. So cute! But, I should be going to the grocery store or organizing and certainly I should be thinking about what to wear to the birthday dinner tonight. It's much colder than I thought it would be when I picked out my outfit a few days ago.

This photo courtesy of my father. Please excuse the tea-stained tounge, it was breakfast. I figure it's a variation on my Aunt Mary's traditional chewed up brownie/chocolate cake mouth shot!

So much with the tired. I don't want to pack. I don't want to sit on the airplane for 8 hours. I don't want to climb the hill in the cold to stand and wait for the bus to get to the train which takes me to the airport *before* my 8 hours of airplane time.

To be honest, the airplane time isn't the worst part. I just don't feel like doing the cleaning and packing required before I leave this morning. I just want to lay in bed and have tea and oatmeal and toast with jam magically appear all made and just right.

In other words, I'm feeling really lazy!

But, I'd better get to it.

Remember:

Bring: Mom's birthday card
Don't Bring: Leatherman
Bring: PJs
Don't Bring: Doc Martins
Bring: Power cords for electronics (!)

I just read the most fun book! It's called The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists by Gideon Defoe.
So funny. Here is an excerpt:

Holding pens and rulers, and white lab coats covering their piratical paraphernalia, the pirates followed Darwin into the Royal Society Gentlemen's Club.* There were several famous scientists present, some sitting around smoking, some engaged in animated discussions about the latest scientific topic, and some just watching the dancing girls. The smell of opium hung heavily in the air.

*The Royal Society was set up in 1660, and many famous scientists have been members, including Robert Boyle, Robert Hooke, and John Venn. Why not try drawing a Venn Diagram of 'pirates' (A) and 'ham' (B) and 'barrels of tar' (C)? How large is the intersection (X)?

This is a short, easy to read book. Head over to the local library for a couple hours and nestle in to read it in one go!